Alex due another delicious spanking from Nicola

The BBC Scotland website has revealed that earlier this month, April, Alex Salmond MSP stepped out of line yet again in grabbing pole position in the battle for supremacy of First Ministers.

The former First Minister has been caught on video, boasting to a fundraising gathering of the party faithful, that: ‘The Scottish Labour leader will not be writing the Labour Party budget. But then I knew that already – because I’m writing the Labour Party Budget.’

Prime Minister, David Cameron, has understandably had fun in tweeting this latest in a line of serially indefensible and self-centred usurpations by Mr Salmond.

Mr Salmond has tried to talk his way out of another painful visit to the Headteacher’s study, with the tawse to hand. [Will Ms Sturgeon wear for the chastisement the black leather of the dominatrix portrait, with whip, she has revealed her husband presented to her as a wedding present?]

The Salmond excuse, worthy of Dame Edna on a bad night, was: ‘The point made in a light-hearted way was that Scottish Labour leader Jim Murphy had been slapped down by his party bosses at Westminster and told that he would have no role in a Labour Budget.’

Logic is not on Mr Salmond’s side in this attempt. Had he been making this joke solely at the expense of the Scottish Labour Leader with no trace of self-aggrandisement, he would have said:  ‘I knew about that already. Nicola‘s writing the Labour Party budget’; or even ‘We’re writing the Labour budget’.  But no. It was the old familiar ‘I‘.

A whipcrack slapdown from a far more fearsome practitioner of the art is certainly coming Mr Salmond’s way. Ms Sturgeon has visibly been losing patience of late with the scene-stealer par excellence.

Mr Salmond’s has Ryder Cup ability to rock his own once-upon-a-time pomp at the fill of a glass of the pink stuff. He has repeatedly failed to deploy loyal discipline in favour of his stellar successor.

This constant insecurity has left Ms Sturgeon, the current First Minster, with no choice but to inform the media that she will be in London on the morning of 8th May, to lead the negotiations with Labour in the possible event of a hung parliament.

An option to be explored on 7th May by evilly mischievous tactical voters in the Gordon constituency where Il Magnifico is standing for Westminster would be not to oppose him but to vote en masse to send him south.

No other instrument is anything like so unguided a weapon of mass destruction, so certain to cause distraction, disarray and implosion in the party. Let loose amongst the established egos of the SNP’s old hands competing for glory at Westminster, with a massive horde of rookie SNP MPs six times their number and the lobby journalists hanging on his every word, that song of twilight will fade and the chuckle-and-nod routine will be back on the box on a daily basis..

We will see First Minister Sturgeon, beached up north in boring old second rate Holyrood, having to be permanently in the air between Edinburgh and London, with a fire extinguisher in one hand and that well-used tawse in the other.

Mr Salmond’s election in Gordon does have considerable attraction for the anarchists – as well as the sado-masochists – amongst us.

The BBC video and story is here.

 

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Related Articles & Comments

  • what a despicable article and I am a tory Bye Bye Your webpage has been deleted

    Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 14 Thumb down 21

    clipclop April 22, 2015 6:33 pm Reply
    • Trot along then! :p Come on – giddy up!

      Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 16 Thumb down 10

      Jamie Black April 22, 2015 6:35 pm Reply
      • clipclop is just horsing around – he doesn’t really mean it – he was just adding to the overall humour that we all enjoy when referring to Alec salmond.

        Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 14 Thumb down 9

        Malcolm Kirk April 22, 2015 6:55 pm Reply
    • Lol, make up your mind clipclop, in a previous post you said you were a Libdem supporter

      Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 13 Thumb down 5

      John M April 22, 2015 7:01 pm Reply
  • Haw haw, who is paying for Newsie to spout this tosh.

    Jaze it gets worse by the day.

    Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 13 Thumb down 15

    Willie. April 22, 2015 7:08 pm Reply
    • An interesting question Willie.

      I can’t see any viable income stream for this blog . . . perhaps Newsie does have some unionist sponsorship she is not telling us about.

      It would help explain the shocking lack of integrity and the complete lack of attempt to provide any political balance whatsoever.

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 5 Thumb down 4

      Longshanks April 23, 2015 11:37 am Reply
      • Longshanks, just to help your credibility here – do agree that the most popular pro-SNP and pro-Indy sites Wings and NNS lack any integrity or political balance?

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 4

        Jamie Black April 23, 2015 12:59 pm Reply
  • Aye, mair drivel.

    Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 11 Thumb down 12

    Willie. April 22, 2015 7:16 pm Reply
  • I thought the tactical voting thingy was hilarious,this beats it by a country mile.
    Who writes this stuff? Spike Milligans ghost??

    Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 11 Thumb down 13

    Machmaolain April 22, 2015 7:49 pm Reply
  • Willie, I see you’ve found a new word, (jaze) do you know what it means? I think you need to read this
    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Jaze
    Are you a crazy Belgian person?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 6

    richard April 22, 2015 9:24 pm Reply
  • Sexual innuendo from Lynda Henderson a pretendy journalist.
    Do you believe Ms Henderson and Mr Dixon- Spain that this will encourage people not to vote for the snp?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 1

    No Cheese Here April 23, 2015 1:17 pm Reply
  • How sad to see that what started some years ago as an informative and sometimes challenging website has descended to this juvenile level of political commentary.
    Carries a distinct whiff of the Daily Mail.
    Certainly has no connection to the late and great Spike Milligan.

    “For Argyll?” In your dreams!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 2

    Ken MacColl April 24, 2015 3:35 pm Reply

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