Today, a someone, a household name in our country, offered me £10 million pounds to invest on the stock market. I was tempted with a 2% initial fee plus 20% of the profit on any decision I make.
A few folk who read ForArgyll will know who’s really written this and are doubtless grinning ‘cos they know what comes next.
My brain says NO. With a capital F. I require just 12k per annum to maintain my happy and somewhat boring lifestyle of whisky, boats, and expensive food for my dogs.
Today, a bubble wrapped package arrived from Inverclyde Hospital containing a wee jar of something which tastes of liquorice. I’ve to drink it 90 minutes before something called a CT scan which will tell my doctor (who’s consulting desk is in a VERY public corridor on Level L) how far leukaemia has affected my body.
20% of ten million pounds will not fix this problem. The only thing which will fix it is the excellence of the medical people.
But can I rely on a health service where the bloke who’s discussing my ‘condition’ is doing so from a cheap formica desk with the only claim to fame being the hand-written sign ‘Haematology Unit’ above it?
Nurses, OAP’s, and ladies visiting the adjoining gynaecology unit walk past the desk while I chat to the doctor discussing my ‘sell by’ date.
I said YES to the ten million pounds. I will make my 20% profit and there are a bunch of other people queuing to allow me to do some magic for them. Our SNP Govt should be scared of my reasons for saying yes.
Who am I?
A wee fat bloke who stays in Argyll.
I wrote some software which makes sense, NOT of the stock market, but instead maps the trading formula employed by the people who control market prices. They use computers and rely on their software rather than ‘free market’ forces.
The result has been a pretty reliable track record in predicting what’s going to happen next. When the Daily Telegraph published some of my numbers in August 2011, a few folk started to pay close attention as my error levels for the FTSE 100 shares were less than 0.005%.
When the price of GOLD fell off a cliff in September 2011, one or two other grown ups raised an eyebrow as I’d published the drop targets at the start of that month. Even APPLE’S recent fall from the tree was documented before it happened.
So, why should our Scottish Government be scared?
Simply because people like me are speaking with our doctor about life expectancy in a public corridor.
A long time ago, I wrote a book about Scottish independence but I’d never conceived of us being governed by mental midgets.
We seem to be in a situation where our Govt Ministers accept without question anything given by a civil service – regardless of whether it leads to school closures, idiotic toy ferries, a hopeless health service or a country where silly wind farm factories are considered an employment success simply because the country itself has committed to waste money on a stupid vanity project by buying the products of a factory which created pretend jobs.
It’s right up there with reasons for the financial shambles we find ourselves in.
Off Topic Time.
From a very basic engineering viewpoint, has no-one noticed the tide?
It comes in.
Then it goes out.
Imagine something radical.
Trap a decent sized bit of the rising tide behind something like a lock gate and allow it to leak through a generator as the tide goes out. Would that not generate power? You could even use the same lock gate to slow the incoming tide through a small hole in the gate and also generate power.
Not a single ridiculous windmill is required. The tide will occur as long as the moon continues its dance around our planet. The wind however DOES NOT BLOW when Scotland experiences low temperatures which kill people.
Or alternatively, I can speak to my doctor in a public corridor. People can also be stored on beds in cold corridors awaiting blankets for warmth. Which, if we, as sane people had adopted nuclear power, would not be needed as our energy would already be cheap.
Obviously, as someone with leukaemia, I should be banging the anti-nuclear drum but to do such would also want me to un-invent the wheel and ban fire. Both of which kill weekly many more people than nuclear power generation ever has.
We’re Scottish and should be looking to a positive future rather than regressing to the 19th century, a time where people were also dealt with in hospital corridors.
I’ve asked ForArgyll to keep this anonymous. A few folk (who are chums) will know my real anger at the absolute incompetence of our SNP govt. They mean well but most of ‘em cannot spell the word ‘balls’.
Once the chemo nonsense finishes its first punch, I intend to start a course of corrective therapy. After all, I only need 12k a year to maintain my very simple lifestyle and will be happy to cause trouble.
I want independence but also want managers who can manage. For as long as we’re not viewing photos of Mike Russell at Cannes Film festival or sunbathing on St Barts, I shall assume he is not a good manager as he’s not able to manage. A good manager can take time off to get pissed rather than keep working and piss off the electorate.
Unfortunately, the same applies for the rest of our SNP government. They are too busy ‘fire fighting’ and forget they need to challenge the bloke with the matches, our Scottish civil service.
Somehow, the idea of Alex Salmond on the Cresta Run…? Nah.
I’d be happy seeing him papped going through the gates at Fort Augustus on a rental boat. Which would be more sea worthy than the stupid Dunoon toys.
Note: This reader obviously has a sharp wit. In the request for anonymity, the suggestion was made that ‘the name ‘Sue Denholm’ `always makes it past most editors’.